Conan O’Brien at the
after-party |
KING
OF CANADA COMEDY
Star
Turns Over A (Maple) Leaf
By Taping An All-Canuck Show
 HANKS
to Conan O’Brien I spent my one day in Toronto exploring
the world’s tallest tower. It happened this way.
I came to Toronto to see
Conan tape the first of four shows of his Late Night stint on
NBC. Thousands of frenzied fans braved the bitter February cold,
standing since 6 a.m. in lines that wrapped squarely around the
block.
The 1,200 who were admitted
into the Elgin Theatre on Yonge Street for each afternoon’s taping
were not disappointed. They whooped, hollered and clapped with each
appearance of a stagehand until the star came out to welcome “my
Canadian babies.”
With Conan seated behind a
desk carved with maple leaves, Mike Myers, of Austin
Powers renown, talked about his roots in Scarborough, Ontario,
and going to Stephen Leacock Secondary School with Will &
Grace’s Eric McCormack (a guest later in the week).
While Canadian native Myers
is presently comfortably based in La La Land, Conan rolled out
homegrown, home-based Canadian talent in the form of humorist Ron
James.
C-Lounge bartender |
As Ron held forth in plaid
shirt and sneakers, I wondered how many American viewers understood
the Queen’s English that spewed from his mouth. I was barely able
to decode one line – and I’m Canadian born!
Most people here speak a
language that Americans can readily understand. Not Ron James. He
reminds me of my grade school Latin teacher in Winnipeg who would
get upset and holler, “Get your hoot and your coot and get oot!”
“We’re not a big
military power,” Ron said.
“My American friends ask,
‘How come you didn’t help us in Iraq?’
“You need weapons for
that, don’cha?”
Every show was maple
syrupy, with all the requisite cultural stereotypes thrown in (the
beaver was spared), but the Toronto Maple Leafs and the Mounties
were represented.
Conan’s monologue was
heavily sprinkled with Canuck references:
 In
a new poll, 54 percent of Canadian teenagers say they use marijuana.
The other 46 percent say they grow it.
Here,
rapper 50 Cent is known as 75 Cent.
Gay
marriage is legal here, which makes sense because the city’s most
famous symbol is an 1800-foot penis.
The next day I decided to
take a gander at that giant erection, otherwise known as the CN
Tower. A high-speed elevator, zooming up at 15 mph, brought me to
the top in 58 seconds. The observation deck, the world’s highest
at 147 stories, gave me a magnificent view of this visitor-friendly
city.
CN Tower |
I dare you to step on the
glass floor for a look down 1,122 feet to the ground. Believe me, it
takes nerves of steel to walk on the glass floor. The floor consists
of 20 pieces of composite glass that are 2½ inches thick.
Don’t worry, the floor
will hold your weight. In fact, it will hold 14 hippos (85,000
pounds), although it was never tried as they’ll never be able to
get them up in the elevators!
The 360 Restaurant features
outstanding food fare with a revolving view of the city 1,000 feet
below.
The American Society of
Civil Engineers classified the CN Tower as one of seven modern
wonders of the world.
I hope Conan made an effort
to scope out the city before heading back over the border at the end
of the week. In my one day in town I had time not only for the CN
Tower but also to explore the thriving Entertainment District,
walking along Queen Street, sprinkled with interesting boutiques,
and King Street, filled with quaint clubs, inviting restaurants and
live theatres.
I stayed overnight at the
imposing Holiday Inn on King strategically located a block or two
from the Financial District. It’s an excellent business/tourist
hotel offering all amenities you could ask for.
Restaurants on King St. |
My compliments to general
manager Marlin Keranan whose dedicated staff provided
the most comfortable lodging and outstanding service.
The locals had advised
Conan to keep stereotypes at a minimum. Stereotypes? They held his
first night party at the C-Lounge Nightclub where the bar, the
buffet table and some of the lounging chairs were cut from ice, and
where Mayor David Miller presented him with a Maple Leafs hockey
jersey and a foot-long key to the city made of—ice. By this time
Conan was wearing leather gloves.
“They told me to say
something funny,” the mayor said. “I don’t have anything funny
to say.”
“I know what that’s
like,” Conan retorted.
|
